My thoughts in Taglish

this week felt like a long week.  siguro rin kasi di ako sobrang busy (both work and personal life).  tapos yung mga shows sa cbs puro pa lumang episodes except for “the mentalist”.  well, my disappointment started monday.  kasi i now watch a few shows sa fox.  monday is “house” and “lie to me”.  ready na ako nung monday, 7 pm, i’m at home, turn on the tv to fox, and what did i see?  baseball   pero come 8 pm it showed “lie to me”, i think.  my golly!  di ko na maalala, for real.  tapos tuesday same thing, 7 pm ready to sit and watch, old episode of “ncis”.  pati yung “ncis:la” luma rin, kabago bago na show, lumang episode kaagad.  hay…  wednesday ganun din for “criminal minds” and “csi:ny”.  kaya nung thursday i was thinking in my head “i bet you ‘the mentalist’ is showing an old episode as well” and to my surprise, it wasn’t.  or if it was, i haven’t watched it before.  in a way it’s good na rin kasi i got to catch up on the pinoy shows.   shows with “s” kasi i also watch “pinoy big brother” now.  i like melai and paul jake.  parang ang sarap maging friend si melai.  si paul jake naman, well, he’s cute & funny and he gets along with everybody.

aside from watching the pinoy shows, reading the forum at pinoyexchange about pbb took up a lot of time too.  tapos there’s boundless pa, nagkataon a lot of people commented on that one post.  it’s interesting to read that there are so many christian singles out there.  some commented nga that they should organize a conference.  come to think of it, bakit nga ba walang singles conference.  they have conference to strengthen marriage, pero parang wala naman for singles.  or baka meron but i just didn’t hear about it.

talking about singleness, i came across two great books regarding singleness.  my favorite book on this topic used to be “table for one” by camerin courtney pero now it’s “press play” by patti gordon.  i was crying after i read chapter one kasi i can totally relate.  the other book (which i’m currently reading) is “what’s a girl to do” by janet folger.  i just finished chapter one and i know that i’ll like it.  i like how both authors are still single in their late 30s so they know exactly how/what it feels like.  kasi yung mga books on singleness dati puro written by someone who’s married na and the stuff they write are focused more on how to find a guy and stuff like that.  meron namang ibang authors na ang dating eh holier-than-thou, yung sobrang focus naman sa “all you need is God” “God is your husband”.  i mean, i understand that He should be our focus and all, pero dahil nga sa holier-than-thou attitude eh di ako maka-relate.  yung kay patti gordon, it’s so funny. she shares the mistakes that she made, the result of when she listened/didn’t listen to the Holy Spirit’s prodding.  basta, it’s very encouraging for me.  after i finished reading the book nga, it really made me want to get closer to the Lord. i got this quote by oswald chambers (which i posted on fb) from the foreword on the book:  ”The author who benefits you most is not the one who tells you something you did not know before, but the one who gives expression to the truth that has been dumbly struggling in you for utterance.”   oh, one more kwento on books about singleness.  about 3-5 years ago i got such a book as birthday present “did i kiss marriage goodbye?”.  okay sa title, ano?  i know my friend meant well, kasi alam niya i’m struggling with singleness.  pero naman, alam rin naman niyang it’s a sensitive topic for me tapos bigyan ako ng book with such a title on my birthday.  hello?!?!?!?  i don’t think i ever finished reading that book.  all i know is di ako maka-relate.  to me it’s one of those holier-than-thou books.  i won’t say naman that’s the worst gift i got for my birthday pero tumatak talaga sa isipan/memory ko.

last night was parent-teacher conference at awana.  i have 5 girls so you would think i’ll have to talk to 5 parents pero i ended up just talking to 3.  it didn’t take long for each parent kasi, like i said, i have the good and smart girls  they come prepared and motivated to finish the sections.  with regards to them getting distracted since we’re using our pastor’s office, sabi nung director namin, i should tell them it’s a privilege.  if they don’t focus and work on their handbook, that privilege will be taken away and we’ll have to switch with another group and go back to our classroom.  good idea!  one of the parent asked me to talk to her daughter about assurance of salvation.  i realized then that i just assumed they all are saved kasi they grew up at church.  it made me realize that i need to be praying for that.  and i ask you, my few loyal readers, to please pray for me too.  that i’ll be clear in presenting the gospel when the opportunity arises and that i’ll be able to explain well for them to understand.  i’m planning to bring my evangecube next week.  btw, one of the parent said that his daughter talked about me and likes me  i really like them too   i’m thinking nga of going to church early on fridays.  kasi some of the girls are there early, that way i can chat with them more.   oh, there’s this other girl (she’s in 3rd grade) that i like.  she’s very malambing kasi.  last night she was crying kasi a boy did something to her balloon kaya the balloon was hanging low.  tapos she mentioned too that she left her bible in sunday school a while back kaya now she doesn’t have a bible.  i think the Lord prodded me last night to get her a bible so i will make my way to the christian bookstore again.  i say again kasi this will be my 4th visit in the past two weeks.  that’s where i found the books on singleness… on sale

nothing planned today except visit the lius and help out (sort of) with melissa’s birthday gathering.  ako nagprisinta last night kasi when pru told me that she’s having about 15 girls (9-10 yrs old), i asked if she’s the only adult.  she’ll have two teenager helpers (megan and her friend) daw but i’m more than welcome to go help out, to which megan fully agreed, hahaha…  but that’s not until later this afternoon.  so i’m going to just relax this saturday morning.  thank God for the weekend

p.s.  no homework for chinese school, yay!  well, last night teacher yow-yi said she sent an email with the homework.  i told her i didn’t get any email from her and i assumed that she forgot.  sabi niya she’ll send it daw pag-uwi (last night) but i still haven’t gotten it, so, no homework!!!

p.p.s.  we get an extra hour due to the time change.  yay!!!

p.p.p.s.   november na bukas.  matatapos na ang 2009.  ang bilis naman.

one last thing, promise.   we had a pinyata at awana last night.  it’s our way of giving out candies i guess.  the pinyata is so cute!!!

just in case i decide to shut down my xanga.  i don’t wanna lose this post so here it is…  it’s more than a year old.

chicago trip

saturday (7/12)
katie and i were scheduled to fly out of love field (i know it’s weird, we’re flying to o’hare and yet we’re flying out of love field) around 11 am but like just a typical flight, it was delayed.  since we had so much time to kill we slowly walk around to buy breakfast at mcdonald’s.  we didn’t leave dallas until after 1 pm.  by the time we got to chicago it was past 3 pm and since we haven’t had lunch we decided to buy something to go.  where did we end up getting our late lunch?  mcdonald’s  good thing we didn’t have mcdonald’s for dinner.  that would have been a first for me - mcdonald’s for breakfast, lunch and dinner 

i didn’t know that theresa will be picking us up from the airport (katie was the one who coordinated everything with theresa).  i was actually prepared to take the train;  i already researched it the night before we left.  but anyway, i was so glad to see theresa again .  last time i saw her was at katie’s wedding almost 2 years ago.  we went to her place and rested a little bit.  later that afternoon we walked down michigan avenue to get to the millennium park for the free concert at the park.  we stopped by the bean and took pictures, of course.

we met up with some of theresa’s friends there and had a picnic. i especially enjoyed the sparkling wine .  (sorry no picture of the group)

i really like this shot, it looks artistic, i think.

after the concert we walked to navy pier to see the fireworks. (yeah, i’m not very good at taking pictures at night)

we were going to get something to eat at the beer garden in navy pier but unfortunately when it came to our turn to order we were told that the kitchen just closed , and they’re only serving drinks at that time.  so we walked away and found a place that serves food.  thank God we found one.  by the time we walked home it was past midnight (i think, i’m telling ya, i can’t quite remember anymore).

sunday (7/13)
sunday morning we went to worship at CCUC (chinese christian union church).  then went to joy yee for lunch where the drinks and dishes are texas size.  i think one dish could serve 2-3 people (well, people who eat a lot like me, it may serve even more for people who eat like katie and theresa ).  after lunch we bought pastries from the chinese bakery to eat for breakfast.  too bad they didn’t have the taro bun.  we left chinatown and headed back home to rest a little bit.  since theresa is free that day (she’s not on call, thank God!!!) we decided to visit some of the places that aren’t easily accessible by public transportation or within walking distance.  first stop is the united center where katie wanted to take picture of the michael jordan statue.

next stop — superdawg (for dinner).  it’s my first time to taste a pickled green tomato, kinda interesting taste.  oh, the superdawg is really good — big, juicy and tasty .

last stop — berry chill (for dessert).  we went there twice (well, katie and theresa went there thrice) during our chicago trip.  every time we go there’s a long line.  it’s that famous.

by the time i remember to take a picture i had already finished my frozen yogurt.  so i made sure to take a picture when we went there the second time (the bottom two pictures).

monday (7/14)
katie and i took the boat tour architecture river cruise (chicago architecture foundation).  impressive buildings!  i don’t remember anything the guide talked about though.  i just know i like the art deco buildings more than the modern ones.

man!  it was hot that day.  my camera was getting really hot from using it constantly (yeah, i took tons of pictures of the different buildings) and from the direct sunlight.  i wore a cap but my face still got darker ; my arms got darker too .  it really sucks because when theresa first saw me on saturday she said that i look fairer since she last saw me.   now i have to stay indoors for months again in order for the tan to slowly fade .

i had the chicago style deep dish pizza for dinner.  theresa and katie preferred the thin crust (which isn’t really thin at all).  my opinion on the pizza — it’s ok.  i just want to be able to say i’ve tried it.  according to pj, i should have tried the one at gino’s east.

to be continued…

tuesday (7/15)
we were told about the lottery for wicked tickets so tuesday morning we went to the fords center for performing arts to submit our entry form.  after that we took the free trolley to navy pier.  i wanted to see what navy pier is like during daytime and to take a closer look at the stained glass museum.  we walked around, took pictures and had lunch at bubba gump.  later that afternoon we went back to the performing arts center to try our luck (they do the drawing 2 hours before the show).  we weren’t so lucky  so we just walked back home.

wednesday (7/16)
we tried our luck again for the wicked ticket lottery (this time for the matinee show) and walked all the way to the oriental theater box office taking a different route (which we think is a shorter route, well, it felt like that ).  katie wanted to have the sandwich from cosi so we went there and have the food to go so we can be back at the box office for the drawing.  i wasn’t very lucky but katie was.  her name was the last name called.  actually, we didn’t get the $25 front seat tickets but the $25 limited view tickets (which is still very good considering the available limited view tickets are $72 each).  somehow that day there were a lot of asian names called, good thing those asians didn’t show up for the drawing.  when they were drawing the names i was thinking ‘i wonder how they’re going to pronounce my last name’ 

that night i went to dinner with carina’s (a high school classmate) family at a chinese restaurant then they took me to montrose beach.   i found out that i have the same birthday as james (carina’s 2nd son).  carina mentioned that james and i are similar in that we both have strong personality.  that got me thinking… do i really have a strong personality?  i really didn’t think so but maybe i have  while we were at montrose beach, josh (carina’s eldest son) asked me to carry him and then said “let’s go farther (to the deeper part)”, pretty smart eh?

thursday (7/17)
most of the day we were just chilling at theresa’s place.  we watched tv for hours, we just wanted to be lazy.  that afternoon we visited the art institute of chicago (it’s free  on thursday after 5 pm).  theresa’s friend lamont met us there.

after visiting the museum we went to dinner at park grill (close to the bean).  katie wanted to have the fries that we saw on saturday when we were just hanging out at the millennium park.  but unfortunately we went to the wrong restaurant; park grill doesn’t serve fries but chips.  oh well, the burger is pretty good.  next we headed to see the buckingham fountain.  actually i was the one who really wanted to see it.  somehow when i was reading about things to see in chicago the fountain caught my attention.  it was ok.  i guess i expected to see something more spectacular (that’s the problem with having expectations, you end up getting disappointed.)  on our way home we stopped by ghirardelli for ice cream.

friday (7/18)
i had originally wanted to visit the sears tower but i was advised to go to the john hancock building instead, it has a better view i was told so friday katie and i had lunch at the 95th floor signature room.  i had the lunch buffet , the grilled zucchini was yummy (for someone who doesn’t eat a lot of vegetables, that is something )

we spent the rest of the afternoon walking down the magnificent mile shopping.  for dinner theresa took us to joy yee again because katie wanted to get their slush/freeze.  i ordered the cappuccino with coffee jelly but was disappointed, it wasn’t what i was expecting ;  good thing the french style ribs i ordered was yummy .  we spent our last night in chicago chilling at theresa’s place.  oh wait, katie was busy with her poster.  we walked to a nearby cvs to get the supplies and on our way back there were two sketchy people behind us, we just walked real fast and was thankful to get to theresa’s place safely.

saturday (7/19)
last day in chicago.  nothing planned except…. go to the allstate arena to see the american idols.  no, it wasn’t me who’s obsessed with the idols.  lamont was so kind to drive us there and allow us to leave our luggages in his car while we stand in the rain and sun waiting for the idols to arrive.  i think we stood there for 4-5 hours.  we got there around 10:30 am and the idols came out to meet the fans around 1:30 or 2:00 pm.  katie was happy to have gotten the idols to sign her poster (except for the 2 david and the other guy) and actually talked to jason this time.  it was an interesting experience for me even though i’m not really crazy about them.  jason and brook are really good looking.  the young lady in front of me is a fan of carly. she made a scrapbook for carly, carly really loved it and gave her a ticket to the ‘meet and greet’ later that afternoon.  lucky huh?  somehow the people around me are lucky but not me 

after being out for several hours i was happy to sit down and have a late lunch at mitsuwa marketplace.  was disappointed with my taro drink though.  ai-ya!  i don’t seem to have luck with my drinks.  since our flight doesn’t leave chicago until almost 9 pm we decided to go see a movie since we’re too tired to do anything else.  we had no idea that the dark knight will last more than 2 hours.  we left the theater before the movie ended in order to get to the airport on time.  i was really very panicky, i didn’t want to miss my flight home.  well, we got there less than an hour before our flight or so we thought.  turned out our flight was delayed (again! ), the plane didn’t leave until about 10:15 pm (i think).  that just sucks, we could have finished the movie and not rush to the airport.  oh well, i finally got to my apt around 1:30 am.  home sweet home 

i had told katie that i’ll be skipping church the next day since i’m so tired but i actually made it.  i remember that i have to get the package from ann that hizon brought from the philippines.  too bad i didn’t get to meet up with hizon. he chose that one sunday that i’m not in dallas to visit dcbc, ai-ya!!!  anyway, i forgot to get the package actually.  i just went straight from the worship service to sunday school to hanging out with ann.  the package was in pj’s office, by the time i remembered, pj already left .

yes!  i’m finally done with this blog.  next time i think i’ll just blog on friendster.  i had wanted to write so much more but can’t quite express them in english. 

just got an informal invitation (formal one to follow) to a wedding next month. i just heard that my friend got engaged about two weeks ago and the wedding is next month na, as in the first saturday of november.  grabe! ang bilis! i was a bit hesitant to say “yes” to the evite kasi i’ll be seeing people from the church i used to go to.  don’t get me wrong, it’s not that i don’t want to see them, pero kasi eto at single pa rin ako.  they’re all younger than me except for the pastor & pastor’s wife and another couple and they’re all pretty much married/engaged/in a relationship now.  it’s been 6 years since i left the church.

it sucks that i struggle with singleness a whole lot more than others (i think).  could it be because i’m an older single kasi?  or maybe because in the past few weeks i’ve heard news about friends having baby/about to have a baby and engagement/wedding.  i’ve prayed before (and still praying) that the Lord will just take away the desire.  i mean, if there’s no desire, eh di problem solved, di ba?  oh how I wish life is that simple.

i wrote the paragraphs above this morning.  tapos during my lunch break while reading “living single one day at a time” by jane wilder, i came across these:

top ten challenges of living single

1.  going to weddings alone… but dancing with anyone you want!

4.  waiting for mr. right… but at least you didn’t settle for mr. wrong!

6.  becoming more selfish… but having freedom to consider your dreams!

10. no guarantee to have a companion for the holidays… but no cranky in-laws to deal with!

top 20 benefits of living single

1.  eating whenever you want

2.  eating wherever you want - living room, bedroom, etc.

3.  listening to whatever music you want in the car

4.  setting the thermostat in the house and car to your perfect temperature

6.  consulting only God on where to spend your money

14. participating in last-minute ministry opportunities without consulting anyone

20.  you can still continue to dream about the wonderful guy that the Lord might have for you right around the corner

o, take note, sa #20 the key word is “might” kasi there is no guarantee

i’m glad we have awana tonight.  wala kasing awana last friday due to missions week.  i did miss my girls!  but was also thankful to have the night off last friday.  complete attendance tonight at medyo hyper sila.  they were so loud, ai-ya!!!  getting them to focus is a challenge once again.  this time kasi they’re in a chismis mode.  i think nag-umpisa yun dahil one of the girls asked me if they’re supposed to call me ‘haidee’ or ‘teacher haidee’.  sabi ko ‘teacher haidee’ or ‘auntie haidee’.  then one girl made a comment that she doesn’t like calling me ‘auntie haidee’ kasi it sounds so old daw.  tapos napunta yung usapan to how old i am.  unang guess 32, tapos yung isa 30.  they eventually guessed it right and said that i don’t look my age, i look like 22 daw, hahaha… binola pa ako  anyway, after that, next question naman eh “are you married?”  some of the girls answered for me.  tapos biglang tanong yung isa “do you want to be married?”  my response “uh…. focus, girls, focus!”  next question “do you have a boyfriend?”  follow up question “have you had a boyfriend?”  my goodness naman ‘tong mga girls ko.  basta ang sagot ko sa kanila “focus, girls, focus!”.  para akong nasa ‘the buzz’ kanina, hahaha…

that was a good question huh?  coming from a 10-yr old girl — “do you want to be married?”  i should have asked her why she asked me that.  is it because i’m at my age and still not married so she thought that it could be because i don’t want to be married?  interesting… i told you, i have the smart ones

hay, salamat at weekend na.  but i remembered earlier that i still haven’t done my homework for chinese school.  hay…

that’s how i feel about my friends who check up on me.  i’ve had several email/chat with friends during the week asking me how i’m doing physically.  i’m better na, the medication is working pero i think i’m not 100% well kasi basta medyo napadami lang ang kain ko eh i can feel the pain and feeling nauseous na naman.  sabi ko nga, it’s God’s way of shrinking my stomach  well, as if that’s not enough, the Lord decided to allow me to have a singaw, ang sakit kaya.  i really thought it’ll go away on its own pero parang lalo siyang lumalala   ang sakit, feel na feel ko pagkumakain ako.  alam naman ni Lord na i enjoy eating/food pero somehow in the last few weeks eh di ko gaanong na-eenjoy ang pagkain.  i’m gargling with salt water na nga eh para gumaling yung singaw pero parang wa effect.  sabi ni kim i should eat something “chin” kasi i’m too “diyet” daw.  she suggested bittermelon, which i have been eating.  for some strange reason i’ve been craving ampalaya (the one cooked with egg) since last week kaya these two weeks ampalaya ang veggie na kinakain ko.  pero it’s not helping either   pesteng singaw, please go away!!!

i really appreciate my friends checking on me.  for real.  kasi i think as single, one of the fears/worries is that i could be dead for days/weeks and no one would know.  i didn’t make that up.  i’ve read and heard single people say that.  and i do sometimes think that way too.  buti na lang i have a job outside home so if i don’t show up for work, magtataka yung supervisor ko and will hopefully check to see why i didn’t make it to work.  sometimes a week will pass by with no email/chat/phone call from anyone until we see each other at church on sunday.  sad huh?  but that’s life!

anyway, a special thank you to my friends for checking on me and praying for me

my friend katie gave birth yesterday (oct. 14th).  baby noah benjamin is here!  buong araw kahapon natetense ako, feeling ko anytime now i’ll get the txt msg that he’s arrived.  the thing is nung tuesday it was decided that she’ll be induced early (set for next thursday).  tapos very early yesterday her water broke.  i guess ready na si noah lumabas   i haven’t visited them yet kasi i had made dinner plans already last night.  remember i forgot shigeko’s birthday?  well, the only nights she’s available this week are wednesday and friday.  i couldn’t do friday thinking we have awana (but found out after i set the dinner with shigeko na wala pa lang awana this friday).  i had fun last night.  and sobrang natuwa kasi shigeko really liked my gift.  pano kasi it’s something that she’s wanting and looking for pala but i didn’t even know.  naisip ko lang na it’ll be good to give her that.  it was the right size and style daw.  the funny thing is when i was looking for her present over the weekend, i almost got her something else but all of a sudden i thought, why not get her this other item instead.  i’ll take that as the Lord’s leading

the other night while i was praying for katie and noah, bigla akong naiyak.  i was thinking kasi “will i ever get to experience giving birth and being a mommy…”  eh so what naman if not, di ba?  pero ewan ko, di ko napigilang umiyak eh.  well, crying helped me fall asleep, hahaha…